In conversations, remember the key is leaning forward – not back. But remember that such eye contact rules depend on the country or cultural background. The sweet spot for holding eye contact each time is 3-5 seconds. You want to look somebody in the eye 50% of the time while speaking, and 70% while listening to them.
#Closed hands body language how to#
How To Fix: There is what's called the “50/70 rule” (for those living in North America at least). It can make one seem rude, intimidating or hostile. It makes them feel trusting and comfortable with you. However, body language expert Carol Kinsey Goman also states that too much eye contact yields the opposite effect. There's a reason we're taught as children to look people in the eye while talking or listening. It can seriously hurt you right off the bat at a party or during a date.
Too little of it spells bad news in many different ways: you're acting unprofessional, you're unprepared, you're insecure or being insincere with others. Too Little/Too Much Eye ContactĪ lot to be said about eye contact. They also end up being more open and friendly. People are two times more likely to remember if you shake hands with them well. You can add your left hand to better show a sense of care or sincerity but only do so if appropriate. How To Fix: Give a few up and down shakes (no more than 3) and maintain eye contact while shaking somebody's hand. Meanwhile, handshakes with too much force are considered too strong and make you come off as aggressive. Or they indicate someone who's just cold in nature. They can paint a picture of someone who lacks authority and confidence. Weak handshakes are considered weak because they involve sweaty hands or cold hands or hands that barely make contact with the other person's palm. And ultimately, crossing your arms doesn't make you look approachable.Ī handshake that's too strong can make you come off as rather aggressive. Whoever's interacting with you might perceive you as unimpressed or uninterested with what they're telling you. The problem with crossed arms is – like when making an X sign to shield yourself in kids games – they make you seem like you're being defensive. And lastly, keep both feet still and flat on the floor. Remember to keep your legs in front of you and not to the side. Like clasped hands, this can signal you're not feeling confident or comfortable at the moment. This allows you to come across as calm, attentive and open to conversation. How To Fix: Sit with both legs close to each other (not tightly together) in a neutral position. Sit with both legs close to each other in a neutral position. The more your feet tap on the floor or go up and down, the more likely you are to show nerves and anxiety. Foot movements are a big ‘tell’ that we often aren't conscious of. But it can also reveal arrogance and it's often inappropriate in formal situations.Īnd even if your legs aren't too close or far apart, your feet can be a liability. Keeping your legs wide apart signals a certain degree of dominance. By crossing your legs, you can appear defensive, distant or even close-minded. If your knees are together and your feet apart, you can come off as insecure of childish. Keeping your legs locked together shows negative body language. The distance between both your knees or legs can say something about your personality.
Whenever you're seated, your legs and feet can send across messages that you're not even aware of. But it's totally worth the time and effort. Overall, improving your posture does take a while and it may feel unnatural at first. Wear clothes that fit you! Poorly fitting clothes (ex: if the sleeves aren't large enough for your arms) encourage you to slouch in order to “shrink” into them. Good posture involves having your shoulders relaxed, with your head, body, and thighs in a straight line. Make it a habit to keep looking ahead of you since the body follows the eyes. You also want your head, body, and thighs to be in a straight line. If you often need to sit down to accomplish something, it helps to get a chair designed to help you sit upright. Adjust your car seat properly so your head touches the headrest. How To Fix: Good posture involves having your shoulders relaxed and not slumped. Don't slouch – keep your body upright when seated.
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